School and Adoption Sensitivity

This week's Adoption Link Up topic is "School and Adoption Sensitivity."  This is an interesting topic.

Quick background on my family

We have two children.  J was adopted while we lived in Germany.  He has been with us since birth.  When he was two, he became the younger brother when we adopted S who was 4 from Bulgaria.  

Projects requiring baby pictures

Within months of S coming home, he started school as a PreKindergarten student.  PreK students do a lot of projects including pictures of family.  We had read about this and printed articles for his teacher to read.  She was fabulous and worked with us to make sure the projects didn't exclude S by asking for baby pictures.  She worded things by asking for early pictures or young pictures.  We were very fortunate, and we appreciate her sensitivity in how she handled this.

Because J has been with us since birth, baby pictures were never an issue for school projects.

Testing

We had contact with the school prior to S coming home. We wanted them to be aware of this new student they would be getting. The team was amazing! Because S has special needs, the school knew that testing needed to be done.

The following paragraph is from a post I posted in May, Take your test scores and....

"When S started school, we didn’t know for sure how much of an impact his CP and vision issues had on his intellectual development.  We were also dealing with the fact that English was not his first language.  He was adopted from Bulgaria at the age of 4.  Fortunately, we were working with a team that understood all of this.  Just in case they didn’t, I had printed multiple articles off of the internet addressing the issue of testing children who were adopted internationally."

This team was receptive to this information. We were so blessed with them because the next school did not provide us with such positive experiences. 

Family Trees

When the boys had to do family tree projects in primary/elementary school, we gave them ways to incorporate their birth families/culture if they chose.

High School Biology

When J was a freshman, he had Biology in school.  During their unit on Genetics, he came home laughing.  They were discussing eye color and using a Punnett Square.  The teacher was going through the square explaining it.  "If your parents have ____, then you will have ____."  J said he really wanted to raise his hand and explain that both of his parents have blue eyes and he has brown eyes.  

I will be on the couch with chocolate appreciating the fact that our boys' teachers were respectful of our family.

Linking up with:

A Week of Milestones

The College Student

As you can see by my new heading, S has graduated!!  The festivities started last Friday when we headed up to Richmond to the Homeschool convention.  That day we checked him in for graduation, signed his diploma, and sent him off to the Senior Meet and Greet.  He originally had not planned on attending this event; however, he was glad he decided to go.  

Saturday was the big day.  We headed back up to Richmond for commencement practice and the commencement ceremony.  I have to give a shout out to HEAV for a phenomenal job on the commencement ceremony! I made contact with them back in the fall to check on accessibility for S, and everything was in place on Saturday.  The ceremony was very nice, and S was glad he participated in it (again, something he didn’t want to do in the fall).

After the ceremony, we were going to eat at The Cheesecake Factory except there was an hour wait.  We headed to Q’s Barbecue for supper and went back to The Cheesecake Factory to get cheesecake to go.  It was quite yummy!

On Monday, S found out that his College Algebra course has been approved as a transfer credit and his Math Placement Test was waived!  Tuesday he met with the Director of Disabled Student Services to get his accommodations put in place, and he is now registered for Fall classes.  He is starting with English Composition I, Statistics, and College Survival Skills.  We decided that it was better to start slowly and be successful instead of completely overwhelming him.  The Director talked to S about taking the German CLEP to test out of foreign language.  He is pumped up about that.  

Everything S wanted done before we head to Minnesota has been complete.  He is quite happy about that.  

The Junior

J is finally done with school.  He still had 2 exams on Monday:  English and PreCalc.  He is now done!

J hit a big milestone this past week also.  He finished his behind the wheel and passed his driver’s test!  He is a licensed driver.  Woo hoo!  

He has driven himself to/from practice starting on the first day.  It was a little stressful for me, but I know it is part of the process. The coach's wife has him text her when he gets to his car after leaving the gym, and he has to call/text her when he gets home. He has to let us know when he arrives at the gym and when he is ready to leave. He knows that everyone just wants him to be safe and know where he is at.

J missed practice Monday night.  My parents were flying home on Tuesday, so he wanted to spend time with them.  He also had his driver’s test at 6:50 AM Tuesday morning, so we wanted him to be well rested.

Next week, J has two college visits.  Busy, busy!

On the Homefront

We did it!  We managed to get S through middle school and high school.  My husband was very sweet.  He bought me flowers and gave me some cards thanking me for all of my hard work homeschooling S. He’s a keeper!

My parents flew in for the commencement ceremony.  It was a crazy week while they were here. J was doing his behind the wheel.  His school schedule was crazy due to exams.  He had practice.  

My parents and J hung out on Friday afternoon while my husband and I took S up to Richmond. We had the opportunity to connect with a college friend of mine while S was at the Meet and Greet.  It has been 14 years since we have seen her.  We had a great visit.  We may have been a little loud.  We met up with my friend again on Saturday before commencement.  She knows my parents.  It was another loud visit, but it was fun.  

The commencement ceremony was very nice.  J took pictures for us during the ceremony, so we were able to enjoy the whole experience and appreciate the moment.   

It has been HOT here this week.  The heat index has been in triple digits for too many days. Enough said!

Since J has his license, he has started driving himself to/from practice. My husband and I now have extra time in the evening. It is quite strange. We could get used to this.

What have I written this week?

Maintaining Birth/Cultural Ties

We will be on the road this weekend, so you won’t find me on the couch with chocolate.  You will find me in the van with chocolate (see below)!  

We used to eat Ritter Sports when we lived in Germany.
I found this box at Sam's Club for a very yummy price.

Linking up with:

Graduation is 8 days away!

The Senior

S has had an easy week.  He attended a luncheon on Monday to hear a speaker discuss the French influence on the construction of some Army installations near us.  He loved that. Tuesday’s chiropractic appointment was cancelled because the doctor was sick; however, I didn’t check my voicemail prior to leaving for the office in a massive storm.  Oops! Today he has horseback riding.

On the school side, he has been wrapping up his German IV course.  Graduation is in 8 days!!

Last week I wrote how S was waiting to hear from the community college about his College Algebra course but his transcript had disappeared.  It has been found.  He is now waiting on the official verdict as to whether or not he needs to take the Math placement test and if he will get credit for the course.  Looking forward to that decision being made so he can register for his classes.

The Sophomore

J had a great week!  His braces came off on Monday!!!!!!

He’s busy wrapping things up at school.  It is locker clean out time. Oh my word! High school is better than elementary school, but it is still a lot. He came home the other day with his PE shirt and books he had used for sophomore summer reading. We also had the AP History study book and flashcards. He had ideas as to who we could give these items too. Great idea! We are quickly handing things off to families with rising sophomores. The PE shirt is going to a rising freshman.  These families are helping us out by taking this stuff.
J's last day is June 15, a Monday.  Not only is it a Monday, they are taking finals so the kids have to be there.  Finals start next Wednesday afternoon.  He is exempt from the one Wednesday afternoon.  Thursday, Friday, and Monday are two exams each day.  He is exempt from the second one on Thursday.  Being exempt means he can leave campus. He likes that. They get the exemptions if they pass their SOLs (state testing).  They can be recommended to take the final if their final grade can be helped by it.

We scheduled J’s behind the wheel training to get his license.  That will start next Monday. These next few weeks are not going to be any less crazy around here.  We used to say “wait until things get back to normal” but we know that this is our normal.

On the Homefront

As noted from above, it’s been busy here.  We had a great time on our trip to South Carolina last weekend, but we were tired when we got home Sunday night.  

It was a busy week with appointments.  Tuesday we had bad storms and our power went out for 3 hours.  Of course, J had homework that required internet access.  Everything S wanted to get done on Tuesday afternoon required the computer and internet access so we read instead.  

It has been quite rainy here all week.  That makes it hard to get outside work done, and our backyard needs a great deal of TLC.  I happened to see an episode of “Yard Crashers” while we were in the hotel in South Carolina.  I need that to happen to us.

I have been cleaning off bookshelves. I started doing this last summer. Even so, it is amazing how much school "stuff" has accumulated through the years, and I have only homeschooled one child who did the majority of his work on the computer. We have friends from church who homeschool, so I offer my stuff to them.  I realized yesterday that I hadn't cancelled our annual subscription to ALEKS, so I got on that quickly. We have used this for S's math for 5 years, and it was a great fit for him. I have also been printing end of year/school documents: grades, transcripts, reading logs, course descriptions. I have one final letter to send to our school district stating, "S has graduated."

This weekend will be busy.  One of our pastors is moving to New Jersey.  Saturday afternoon their family and dog are supposed to come and hang out at our house while there is an Open House held at their house. That evening is a farewell dinner/program at church.  We are only going to the program.  They are expecting quite a few people which is good; however, it is very difficult for S to get around safely with that many people there.  

We are having friends over along with our pastor and his family Sunday evening for cake and ice cream.

My parents are flying in on Tuesday for S’s commencement.  There will be some house cleaning happening here!  They sleep in S's room when they visit, so he knows his room needs to be cleaned. It's not as bad as it has been in the past, so it shouldn't take him very long.

What did I write this week?

It has taken a village…

Celebrating Adoption Day

This weekend you will find me on the couch with chocolate watching the Dateline episode about medical marijuana on June 7.  My friend is in this episode.  She is an amazing woman!  

Linking up with:

Not quite finished...

The Senior

Life is pretty chill for S at this point in his life.  He is working on finishing up German IV, and he will then be finished with his high school career.  Fourteen years of school (7 1/2 years being homeschooled) will be wrapped up when that course is finished!  [I am just now realizing that he has been homeschooled longer than he attended public school.  Wow!]

The fact that he is graduating has become real to him.  He is accepting this reality (especially since graduation cards and gifts are starting to arrive in the mail).

Things are falling into place for him.  We are getting answers about his transportation dilemma - not necessarily helpful answers to fix the issue but answers nonetheless.  These answers along with some additional information allow us to contact other agencies to try to work out transportation.  We have a friend who has offered to drive S to school one day/week next year if need be.

S is still waiting to hear from the community college about whether or not he needs to take the Math placement test. His transcript for College Algebra was sent to the school and the tracking number shows that it was delivered on May 11. He was told last week that they hadn't seen it. He emailed them with all of the details. Still waiting....

S is going to continue volunteering at the museum this summer.  He has the opportunity to job shadow the Historian there.  He has also contacted another museum about some learning opportunities there.  These items have been done by him - he took the initiative.

It will all work out!  We just keep reminding ourselves and S of  that.

Last weekend S ate his way through the Food and Wine Festival at Busch Gardens.  Oh my word! He didn't make it to a couple of food stands, so he knows we need to go back so he can finish up.

He volunteered for 6 hours on Memorial Day and said they were busy at the museum.  He has horseback riding this morning, and we are heading out of town this afternoon for a friend’s graduation.

The Sophomore

J has had a crazy week again.  Last Friday he had a nephrology appointment for his blood pressure.  Turns out he needed blood work for this appointment, and he needed to be fasting. We didn't know that prior to his appointment.  

Tuesday morning he was back at the lab for a blood draw prior to going to school.  The challenge for J to fast is that he is starving after practice, so he had to go in on a morning when he didn't have practice the day before.  

Tuesday afternoon J had an Orthodontics appointment.  It was his final check before he is scheduled to get his braces off June 1.  The orthodontist said words J did not want to hear, "We will see on Monday.  There is still a small gap here that should really be closed up first." We are praying that he can get them off on Monday.  He has had them on almost 3 years, and he has been diligent about doing everything the orthodontist has asked of him.

J has a Spanish project due next week, but he finished most of it last weekend.  He had to stay after yesterday to make up a Math test that he missed because he was attending the Magnet program awards ceremony on Tuesday when the test was given.

We are trying to coordinate J's behind the wheel instruction so he can get his license.  He is ready.  He went up to our vet clinic and told them he would like to volunteer up there this summer.  Hopefully, that will all work out.  Our neighbor boy did that when he was in high school, and he is now applying to vet school.

J had practice 10.5 hours this week (no practice on Memorial Day and he will be traveling tonight).

On the Homefront

Things are crazy at our house, and I don't think that is going to change until after graduation and  our trip to Minnesota.  We are leaving for South Carolina this afternoon to celebrate with a family friend as she graduates this weekend.  She texted us last month and said, "I need my peeps!"  It will be a quick trip, but it will be fun.

While S volunteered on Monday, my husband, J and I spent time at the beach.  Love going to the beach!  

My husband started working on S's slideshow for graduation.  We finalized S's food choices for his party.  We still need to buy plates, napkins, silverware, etc.  My sister-in-law has purchased 15 boxes of Cheesecake bites from Trader Joe's for one of the dessert choices. They are delicious!

We finalized our trip plans last weekend and made hotel reservations.  We shifted a few things around.  We are visiting the University of Iowa on the front end of our trip rather than on the way home.  J is also going to visit the University of Minnesota.  It will be time for our trip before we know it.  Hopefully the drive will go by as quickly!  The last time we drove to Minnesota the boys were 4 and 2.  A parent at gymnastics practice the other night said, “The drive should be so much better now that they are older.”  One would think so…..

What did I write this week?

My son is not a quitter.

You will find me on the couch with chocolate after our trip to South Carolina.

Linking up with:

Almost to the end of Senior year!

On the Homefront

You know it's been a crazy week when I start with the homefront first.  Our calendar has looked like a mosaic with all of the different colored boxes overlapping and butting up next to each other.  This week the boys have had 3 medical appointments, 2 meetings, an SOL test, and college placement testing.  This is on top of regularly scheduled activities - horseback riding, youth group, and gymnastics practice.  And, my husband had a church meeting squeezed in there.  My husband and I are tired!

Although it was a crazy, busy week, these were all necessary things that were accomplished. That is always a good feeling.  

We have a fairly relaxed weekend ahead of us, so we are looking forward to that.  We are going to a cookout Saturday evening.  We have 2 invitations for Sunday.  Not sure we will make it to both.  S is volunteering all day Monday.  As long as the weather is nice, my husband, J, and I will hang out at the beach during that time.  Looking forward to that!

The Senior

S has had things on the calendar every day this week - Chiropractor, Social Security meeting, College Placement testing, Youth Group, meeting with DBVI Vocational Rehab counselor, and horseback riding.  

With all of the various agency meetings S has had to attend lately, there have been a lot of discussions at home about his future.  They are always interesting conversations as S’s ADD starts to run rampant.  My husband does a good job of summarizing our conversations in his post, Simple problem solving.

This was a week of getting answers and planning the next steps forward. All of the frustration S has felt in the weeks building up to this point is gone as he sees how it all fit together. He got through the wave. Last night was one of the first nights in a LONG time that we didn't have things we needed to get together or discuss or finish something up. He enjoyed that very much.

The big news this week is that S is done with English!!!!  He has one class to finish up for his senior year - German IV.  As he told me yesterday, “You know, I can sit and do that for hours.”  

He hasn't volunteered all month since he has been working hard to cross things off his to-do list. He will be volunteering for 6 hours on Memorial Day.

Tonight we are going to Busch Gardens to partake in the Food and Wine Festival while J is at practice. J figured S could eat his way through the park tonight and make recommendations for when he is able to go. The Food and Wine Festival is S's favorite activity there!

The Sophomore

J had a busy week also.  He started his week with bloodwork for his allergy testing.  He has ended his week with a 730 appointment with the Pediatric Nephrologist for a follow up for his high blood pressure.  My husband took him to the early appointment.

In between his bookend appointments, he had an SOL History test for school.  He has some projects to work on this weekend.  He finished up a project last weekend and is turning it in today (early) for extra credit.

He only had practice for 4 days this week since his coach was just returning from vacation.  J was glad to be back in the gym although he got a nasty rip the first night of practice this week!

What did I write this week?

Graduation is coming - ready or not!

How much did he cost? and other questions  

After this crazy week, you will find me on the couch (and the beach) with chocolate!

Linking up with:

What My Senior Thinks & Testing

The Senior

S has been working to get his last two classes finished.  I won’t say he is working joyfully because he isn’t.

This is what I heard from him on Tuesday…

“I think we should make a deal.”

“I think since I am so close to being finished that you should cut me some slack.”

“I think that I shouldn’t have to write the last essay.”

“I think since you are more excited about me being done than I am that you should just let me be finished.  Then, you can be really excited.”

“I think that I have too much to juggle right now.”

...and the list goes on.  I told him he doesn’t have to finish German IV since that is an elective, but he must finish English 12.  Guess which class he wants to finish and which one he doesn’t?  In addition to everything else he was thinking that day, he thinks I was being ridiculous.

I will say he continued to plug away at his work, so he gets a shout out for that.

***********************************************************************************************************

This was almost an appointment/activity free week for him which gave him a lot of time to get work done.  This was good because he has 3 appointments, youth group, and horseback riding next week.  He needs to talk to transportation also because of his assigned pickup location which isn’t near our house nor is it safe for him to get there (traffic, lack of sidewalks, distance, etc.).  

S has been in frequent contact with the Assistive Technology person at the community college trying to coordinate his accommodations for the placement tests he needs to take.  I have to say that everyone he has emailed at the college has been very quick in their responses.  The AT person has emailed late in the evening and early in the morning.  We were hoping S could get his testing done this week, and he was able to get in to start his English placement test today.  He is there right now.  We are hoping they will waive the Math placement test after they evaluate his request regarding his College Algebra course.  We shall see.  

This afternoon he is doing a telephone conference with his Vocational Rehab counselor prior to their meeting next week.

He did make some graduation party decisions for us which is progress.  Yeah! He knows it is coming.  He has agreed to go to the Senior Meet and Greet which is being held the day before the commencement ceremony.  He also agreed to join the Google group for the graduates.  

The Sophomore

Testing!  That was the word of the week for J and school.  Because it was AP exam week and SOL testing at school, the schedules have been crazy for the kids.  J took his AP History exam yesterday.  He has his Chemistry SOL today.  Next week he will take his History SOL.  Then they will ramp up for finals.

J went to the doctor yesterday to talk about a referral to an allergist.  We talked about if he would be a candidate for allergy shots.  His seasonal allergies are getting worse and he is limited to what he can take due to his high blood pressure.  The doctor has ordered the initial labs for a blood draw; however, J has to wait until Monday since he needs to be off of his allergy medication for at least 3 days.  

He only had practice for 3 days this week because there were other activities at their facility. Since there is no practice tonight, we are heading to Busch Gardens for a little family fun.

On the Homefront

We have accomplished many tasks on our massive to-do lists.  My husband finished sheetrocking the garage for part of my Mother’s Day gift.  It looks very nice out there now. The yard was mowed.  S’s announcements were addressed, stamped, and mailed.  We went to Party City to look at plates, silverware, cups, etc. for the party.  

I have all of the pictures sorted for S’s photo boards.  J is going to finish putting them together this weekend.  There are so many!!  It has been fun looking through the pictures.

What did I write this week?

Take your test scores and….

For some entertaining thoughts from my husband on life with a senior, check out his post - A "Little, Orange" Support Team.  

This weekend you will find me on the couch with chocolate listening to more of my senior's thoughts. Have a good one!

Linking up with:

Take your test scores and.....

Anyone who has a child with special needs has been down the path of testing your child.  The reasoning behind the testing is something like this, “We must test your child so we can see exactly where they are to provide the best education placement possible.”

Having been a former Special Education teacher, I kind of get this thought process.  However, having been a former Special Education teacher, I also know that the test scores don’t give me the complete picture of the child.  I needed to work with the child, talk with the child, observe the child, etc.  The test scores played a very small role in the overall picture.  

And yet….

there is so much emphasis placed on test scores.  You want to label my son, who has multiple disabilities which makes testing him very difficult, and tell me how successful he will be based upon these scores that aren’t normed for a child who has fine motor issues which cause problems with timed tests or vision problems.  

When S started school, we didn’t know for sure how much of an impact his CP and vision issues had on his intellectual development.  We were also dealing with the fact that English was not his first language.  He was adopted from Bulgaria at the age of 4.  Fortunately, we were working with a team that understood all of this.  Just in case they didn’t, I had printed multiple articles off of the internet addressing the issue of testing children who were adopted internationally.  

However,

there is always one person in the meeting who thinks the test scores are “it”.  That person, in this particular meeting, was the school psychologist.  She started spouting numbers like they were written in stone.  I, of course, had already flipped through all the pages to see what the end results said, and it wasn’t pretty.  Had we placed S in an educational program based upon these numbers, we would not be talking about him getting ready to graduate and going to college.  I would not be blogging about his love of History and Foreign Languages.  I would not tell people how he is currently taking German IV and took a year of Russian.  

However,

the rest of the team just wanted a baseline from which to work.  There was no question about his intelligence from them because they had all worked with him individually.  The test scores allowed them to check the box that said they had tested him.

We know that we were lucky to have the overwhelming majority of the team on S’s side.  They wanted to see him succeed academically.  They pushed him to do the best he could in school. The director of Special Education asked me one day if they were pushing too hard.  

“We just want him to be successful, and we don’t want him frustrated.”  

“Oh, you will know if you have pushed him too hard.  It will be VERY clear.”

And then,

we moved.  He was tested again.  

And then,

we moved again.  He went through a triennial review which is hours of testing.  

And then,

we decided to homeschool and that testing stopped.  How nice!  No numbers swirling around anywhere trying to determine what my child can or cannot do.  No numbers trying to dictate his future or educational placement.  

Because we homeschool, we do have to test him at the end of every school year to show progress to the state.  

The numbers are just that….numbers.  They don’t tell me anything I don’t already know.  He has a very strong vocabulary.  He doesn’t do as well with grammar (commas are not his friend).  He does well in math...as long as he writes the problems out and doesn’t try to solve everything in his head.

But now,

as we prepare to send him to college there is a great deal of emphasis on “THE TEST” whether it is the ACT or the SAT.  

However,

in order to get the accommodations S was going to require for either of these tests, we needed current testing data on him. We took him for psychoeducational testing.  So, he had to be tested before the test.  Is that as clear as mud?

Again, the results did not tell us anything we didn’t already know.  Every accommodation that was recommended was exactly what we had told the psychologist he would need.  [I am not hacking on this psychologist.  We brought S in there for this exact purpose.  This doctor was very nice and understood exactly what we were trying to do.]

In the end,

we decided that S would not take the SAT or the ACT. Taking the ACT or the SAT is not going to prove to anyone how well S will or will not do in school.  Only by working with him, talking to him, watching him, understanding how much time and effort he puts into his schoolwork will anyone understand how successful he will be.

Instead,

he will take the placement tests at the community college which is where he will start school in the fall.  We are hoping this will be done in the next 2-3 weeks.  He is working to get his accommodations in place at this point. This is a much easier process and less stressful for him.

So,

you can take your test scores and……find me on the couch with chocolate.